Stories, Thoughts, and Evacuations

…just a place to call my own.

Abuelita and the Poopy Ball

with 15 comments

No… that’s not the title of a new TBS sitcom premiering this upcoming fall season. My mom’s mom… my “abuelita”… sat me down on her knee one day a long, long time ago and told me of a particular time when she placed a little round piece of “brownness” in her mouth thinking it was a piece of candy.

My grandma was a great woman who birthed quite the brood of 12 kids; my mom being the youngest girl. I have a couple of distinctive memories of her:

One was the time she took me to Catholic Church. She was your typical God-fearing church going elder. I recall the orchestrated sit, stand, sit, kneel, sit, curtsy, sit, limbo, and finally the lying down and making of snow angel shenanigans… pretty much cementing my dislike and pointlessness of worship, mass, and religion.

The other memory I recall was “very funny” to my grandma (her words) as she re-told it to me. I looked on with great excitement and wonder! She was cleaning her living room carpet and picking up odds and ends from the floor when she came upon a little brown ball of “something” resembling a chocolate ball treat.

Was it a Milk Dud?

Could it be a Raisinet?

Perhaps a Goober?

All were positively viable assumptions.

She said to me, “I didn’t know what it was… it looked like a little ball of chocolate so I put it in my mouth.” I leaned forward and gazed in amazement at this and asked, “What did it taste like?” And she said, “It tasted like caca (poop)!”

She laughed and laughed at this… and thinking back now, I don’t know if she ever relayed this story to anyone else. You know, sometimes you have to tell someone something just to get it out of your system and maybe this was the time for this particular story. Maybe I was the chosen beneficiary of this grand “nugget” of a tale!

I was very young at the time but even then it struck me as an oddity to be hearing of such mindless doings. I mean, who would pick up something *resembling* a delectable delicacy from the floor and simply pop it in their mouth… no further critique needed… really?

How about looking closely at it or feeling the texture or maybe even smelling it? Nope, my granny’s decision was to put it straight into her mouth and enjoy what was to come… wow! …a taste explosion no one *ever* needs to experience.

Very funny, indeed.

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Written by REscarcega

April 2, 2011 at 4:20 pm

15 Responses

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  1. Yeowch, Abuelita! I love this, “…the orchestrated sit, stand, sit, kneel, sit, curtsy, sit, limbo, and finally the lying down and making of snow angel shenanigans…” You remind me of the first wedding I ever attended in all its Catholic glory–it felt more like a Jane Fonda workout.

    Thanks for stopping at my little blog 🙂

    pennyjars

    April 6, 2011 at 8:41 pm

    • Haha… True – you do need to have your *Jazz Hands* at the ready if ever put in that situation! Wow, first wedding no less… you have my sympathy 😦 and I hope the therapy sessions were few 🙂

      Thanks for the visit, too.

      Ricardo

      April 7, 2011 at 7:23 am

  2. My brother ate a cat turd once, but he did it on purpose to try and make his friend throw up!! I think it worked! Not as funny as Abuelita!!

    Laura

    April 7, 2011 at 10:45 am

  3. Wow… I can’t believe you’ ve never mentioned that before? I *can* believe that one of them would’ve done that, though. In my best guess-timation the probable culprit would fall in this order: Joe, Rust, then Ken. With of course drugs & alcohol playing a major part or money changing hands.

    Aren’t you glad you were adopted? 🙂

    Ricardo

    April 7, 2011 at 12:08 pm

    • Yeah, it’s good that I’m adopted. And you’re right…it was Joe. I’m pretty sure he was sober, but I use that term lightly.

      I guess I never mentioned it because….eeeeewwwwwwwww! Maybe for the same reason you never told me your Grandmother ate a caca ball because she mistook it for a sugar baby!

      Laura

      April 7, 2011 at 1:09 pm

  4. would love to constantly get updated outstanding web site! .

    Jolie

    April 20, 2011 at 6:50 pm

  5. Did she sit you down just to tell you this story? Or had you been talking about something similar like other instances when you ate something and it turned out to be different than you expected? This seems like such an odd and embarrassing story to bring up for no reason.

    The Good Greatsby

    April 20, 2011 at 6:52 pm

    • I recall the “telling” to be purely out of the blue (or brown as it were). It was just something she found very amusing I guess. Embarrassing or not… it taught me to passionately critique anything that went into my mouth from that day forward!

      Hey, thanks for the blog visit. Your blog was a great find and very funny. Cheers!

      REscarcega

      April 21, 2011 at 10:27 am

  6. Hi, Neat post. There is a problem with your site in internet explorer, would test this… IE still is the market leader and a big portion of people will miss your wonderful writing because of this problem.

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    April 21, 2011 at 8:15 am

    • Hello! – thanks for the visit and kind words… I’m on IE now and don’t see any issues on my end. Could you please elaborate on the problems you are having?

      REscarcega

      April 21, 2011 at 1:03 pm

  7. This is hilarious! Loved this story! My mother tells a story of once waking up to a necklace of little turds around her neck–my sister had somehow gotten out of her play pen, taken off her diaper, and thought what she found would look just perfect on poor mom.

    Jenny Torres Sanchez

    April 27, 2011 at 5:52 am

    • OMG! That is classic! Too funny… at least the sentiment was there. 🙂

      Hey, thanks for the blog visit and kind words. I enjoy bringing the yuks!

      REscarcega

      April 27, 2011 at 6:11 am

  8. Oh, this is funny! I love your Grandmother for telling you about this!

    One of my husband’s friends sucked at some brown stuff under his nail once, thinking it was chocolate. He forgot he had recently changed the baby’s diaper – until he realized his mistake. 🙂

    Cynthia Robertson

    May 15, 2011 at 6:18 pm

    • Wow… I guess this really does happen more times than we care to imagine. I’m so anal (pardon the pun) I use to scrub like a surgeon after I changed the little ones. So glad those days are over!

      Thanks for laughing and visiting my little world. 🙂

      REscarcega

      May 15, 2011 at 6:38 pm


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